Every single time I roll out of my driveway I have to cope with the same fearful thought that I had when I first started cycling 7 years ago. "Will I make it back alive today?"
There are sports that hold inherent risks. In mountain climbing there is always the risk of falling; hiking the risk of getting lost; mountain biking the risk of breaking bones in a crash; basketball brings sprained ankles, broken noses; soccer and tennis torn ligaments. But these risks are understood and the athlete assumes the responsibility for taking those risks with their own health. It is a personal choice.
With road cycling though the risk, more often than not, is death. Not because of the dangerous nature of the sport (it's actually relatively benign as far as injury is involved) but because of the carelessness, disregard, and the flat-out animosity of other vehicles on the road.
When it comes to a collision between a 2-ton steel vehicle and 150 pound cyclist, there is little wiggle room for sprained ankles and torn ligaments. The disparity between this match up almost always leads to severe and catastrophic injury to the cyclist.
After 7 years I may have honed my ability to cope with the fear induced by malevolent drivers. I don't jump and swerve anymore when someone startles me by blaring their horn when their car is three feet away. I don't run off the road when a rear view mirror misses my head by a foot (though I probably should). I have learned to swallow my anger when I get run off the road at stop signs by a driver who misjudged how fast I was going and how much time they actually had to pass me. I can even hold my line in the air-wake of a Semi blasting by me at 50+ mph.
However, that fear remains just as potent and present as it was on my very first endeavor. Flash backs from prior close calls still make me break out in a cold sweat.
However, unlike these other sports, it is not for the road cyclist to assume the risk of severe injury or death caused by an inattentive or careless driver; that is not a risk inherent to the sport. That is the direct result of actions taken by one individual which cause harm to another.
For any cyclist abiding by the rules of the road, there is absolutely zero reason for their life to be at risk. By law, they posses the same rights to the road as any other vehicle and demand the same level of respect and consideration as any other vehicle on the road.
So the next time you're passing one, remember, this isn't a matter of fucking pride. You're not clever for "teaching someone a lesson about the road." You are toying with the life of another person, this is a matter of life and death for me and I don't deserve to die simply because I like to ride my bike to places sidewalks could never go.
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